The Day Comes

Monday, 27 September 2010.

Today is the day. It is the day for a resolution to a problem that we have counted along this semester. I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I still pray that everybody will be able to control themselves and the situation as well. It must be a rational discussion, not an emotional one. I hope everything will be okay, InsyaAllah..

This is the last semester for me being a student in this university. So, the subjects that I’ve to take are not so difficult if it is compared to other semester. However, this semester is not easy as predicted. I need to deal with a variety of ‘sharks’ coming in front of me. Sharks? You know what I meant right (if you’ve read my entry about The Japanese Fishermen). I need to deal with different way for different ‘sharks’, or otherwise I’ll surely be eaten by those ‘sharks’. Hehe..

I really feel burned out for the non-academic matters. I feel tired and exhausted with all things around me – people, project, program and social activities. Sometimes, I feel that I’m going to lose my patience towards others. But alhamdulillah so far I’m able to control myself so that it would not hurt my friends’ feeling. I prefer to keep quiet and avoiding to talk with others when I’m in unstable emotion. It is such escapism from turning a bad situation to become worst.

Yesterday, mom called me. She said that she will be having an operation in October. She had already chosen the date for the operation. I don’t know how to describe my feeling when I heard about the news. I really want to go back home. I know that mom will need me to help and take care of her after the operation, but probably I cannot be there at that time. I’ll be having my class during the period of time. Then, what should I do? Mom told me that she will be okay and asked me to pray for her. But I still feel worry. I can just pray that mom will be all right, even though I will not be around…